The Bet
by Kinomi Akai
Summary: COMPLETE. Naruto lost a bet, Sasuke's losing his mind, and Kiba's finding this way too funny. Features maid costume!Naruto and pining!Sasuke. Oneshot, modern setting AU, Sasunaru. It's a maid costume; y'all know the smut is here. Cover art by spideybaby on tumblr!


_Disclaimer: I don't own Naruto, or any of its associated characters!  
_

 _Summar y: COMPLETE. __Naruto lost a bet, Sasuke's losing his mind, and Kiba's finding this way too funny. Features maid costume!Naruto and pining!Sasuke. Oneshot, modern AU, Sasunaru. It's a maid costume; y'all know the smut is here._ _  
_

 _A/N: I don't know, guys, I think I just love writing flustered, pining Sasuke. And smut. I never knew it was so fun to write?  
_

 _If you follow my tumblr (same username), you saw a sneak peek of this fic. Let me know if you recognize the quote! Also a HUGE thank you to spideybaby, who drew the coverart for this fic! I've never had art drawn for me before, thank you so much!  
_

 _This story is not for the eyes of underage readers!  
_

* * *

 **The Bet**

"No way! That is totally unfair—" Naruto's voice was clearly heard, as usual, echoing out into the hall.

Sasuke surreptitiously entered the room, hoping to bypass the conversation entirely. He had work to do, and Naruto tended—

"Okay, okay _fine_!" Kiba gave an exaggerated groan and looked around, "then—Sasuke!"

Sasuke froze mid-step, stifling a sigh.

"Sasuke's a neutral third-party," Kiba waved his arms at the Uchiha. "What about that?"

Naruto didn't look pleased.

"You gotta pick _someone_ , Naruto. Or are you wimping out?"

"I'm not wimping out!" Naruto snapped, "fine! Fine—Sasuke. Sasuke works."

Kiba clapped his hands together, and gave what could only be described as a cackle.

"Great! I'll go get—uh—the preparations," he clapped Sasuke on the shoulder as he passed by him, "you'll tell me everything, right, Sasuke?"

"Remove your hand," Sasuke growled.

"A-ah, right," he held up the offending hand in surrender, "well, I'll—I'll drop the stuff off in a bit."

And then he was gone.

"I have work to do," Sasuke frowned.

"Ah, sorry," Naruto scratched the back of his neck, looking nervous, "I didn't mean for you to get wrapped up in all this. You can still work; I'll be quiet."

Sasuke eyed him doubtfully.

"Well, I'll try, at least," Naruto gave a sheepish grin.

Sasuke snorted and turned on his heel. Naruto followed him automatically.

"So—uh—this bet…" Naruto started. Sasuke tilted his head a little to look at him.

"Ah—you know what," Naruto bit his lip. Sasuke's eyes darted to the motion, "maybe I'll just let Kiba explain it. Heh. Yeah."

* * *

"So!" Kiba dropped the box in front of them with a loud 'THUNK!' Naruto eyed the box in trepidation. Why had he agreed to this? He should have known—he really, really should have known—

"Naruto, here is everything you need. From right now—for twenty-four hours—you are Sasuke's bitch," Kiba waggled his eyebrows. Sasuke's eyebrows reached his hairline.

"Oh god," Naruto wanted to shrivel up and die, "what's in the box, Kiba…?"

"See for yourself," He kicked it over to Naruto.

Naruto crouched down—slowly, hesitantly, his hands were _not_ shaking, thank you very much—and opened the lid just a crack.

Frills. Frills and lace and an apron and _oh my god this was a maid costume_ —

Naruto smashed the lid back on and stared at Kiba in horror.

" _No_."

"No?"

"No—absolutely not—no fucking way—how—why do you even have this?"

Kiba opened his mouth.

"Never mind!" Naruto shouted, "I don't want to know. Oh my god—it's not…it's not—"

"Chill, Naru. It's my sister's old Halloween costume."

"Oh, thank god," Naruto sagged against the box.

"You're gross," Kiba patted him on the head, "but you agreed to these terms."

"…I'm never taking another bet again."

"That's what you said the last time."

Naruto groaned and put his face in his hands.

* * *

"So—Sasuke—to be fully clear," Kiba faced the Uchiha, looking far too pleased with himself, "Naruto is at your beck and call for the next day. He has to at least put that on—make sure he takes a picture. Of both of you, preferably, so that I know you saw it," he pointed to the box, grinning at Naruto's whine of despair, "there's a camera in there. If he doesn't do a good enough job, he has to redo it all."

"Wait, what?" Naruto's head jerked up.

"Sasuke gets to decide if you fulfilled the bet or not. It's only fair," Kiba shrugged.

"Isn't the picture enough?!"

"Nope," Kiba grinned, "it's the costume _plus_ the act. You gotta do both parts."

Naruto stared at him in anguish.

"You agreed to this," Kiba reminded him.

"I didn't know what the costume would be! And you wanted me to do it for _you_ for twenty-four hours, you fuckin' pervert!"

Sasuke blinked several times.

"Yeah, well, you agreed that I got to pick the terms if you lost. So you agreed to _all_ of this."

"I'm an idiot," Naruto bemoaned. Sasuke couldn't disagree.

"Have fun guys!" Kiba waved, scampering off before Naruto's despair could turn to anger.

Naruto slammed his fist against the box, denting the lid. Sasuke eyed him warily.

"Yep, okay," he lurched up, bringing the box with him, and turned to face Sasuke with a determined look, "so where should I go to change?"

Sasuke sighed. He supposed he was done for the day anyways.

"My house is the closest."

* * *

"Naruto," he called through the door, after hearing a snarl, a yelp and then a crash.

"A-ah, one sec—"

"I'm taking a shower," he didn't wait for Naruto to finish before turning on his heel.

Was he purposefully letting the blonde waste the time during which his 'punishment' had to take place? Absolutely not. He just needed a shower; that was it.

Never mind that he had showered that morning.

* * *

"Oi, bastard! Where are you?"

Sasuke was just stepping out of the shower when he heard Naruto's voice echoing through the house.

"In my room, idiot." He called back, digging through his drawers for something acceptable to wear.

Naruto, with no sense of boundaries, came barging in.

"I need help," he said, throwing the door open.

They both froze.

"Aargh!" Naruto clapped a hand over his eyes, "put on some clothes!"

"You put on some clothes!" Sasuke hissed, frantically grabbing for some pants, "what the fuck are you wearing?!"

"What Kiba told me to wear! Why are you naked?!"

"Because I just took a shower, dumbass!"

"So use a TOWEL!"

"I don't NEED ONE!"

They both shuffled away from each other, breathing heavily.

"Do you have clothes on yet?" Naruto still had his hand plastered over his eyes.

Sasuke scowled.

"Yes, dumbass. Do you?" Obviously not. Sasuke could barely tear his eyes away from the blonde. Naruto was right—Kiba was absolutely insane.

Naruto's face was bright red, and his eyes could barely meet Sasuke's.

"I—uh—" he fiddled with the dress, shifting uncomfortably, "it's too small. I can't get the back to zip up. And the socks won't stay up," he growled, yanking the black stockings—with frilly little bows, no less—up to his mid-thigh. The motion caused the back to unzip more, and he froze with an "urk."

Sasuke sighed, walking over. "I don't think it's going to zip up, Naruto."

"Really? Try, at least," he straightened and turned his back to Sasuke, glancing over his shoulder.

Sasuke grimaced, placing one hand on Naruto's waist and using the other to try to ease the zipper up. He swallowed against the lump in his throat.

"Is it going?"

"Not really."

"Damn it." Naruto turned back around. Sasuke pulled his hands away like they'd been burned.

"It doesn't need to zip up to take a photo. Go get the camera."

"Oh! Good point," Naruto shuffled back, sliding on the wooden floor with his stockings.

Sasuke rolled his eyes and followed him into the other room.

Naruto bent over to the box, and Sasuke doubled back, spinning around. Naruto's briefs were riding up and that—that had been a view Sasuke was not prepared for. He leaned against the doorway, hand over his mouth, trying to get his heart rate back to normal.

"It's not in here."

"What?" Sasuke refused to turn around until he heard the rustling that indicated Naruto had stood up.

"There's no camera."

Sasuke sighed, looking around the room. Naruto threw his clothes around, attempting to see if the camera was hidden somewhere—

"Dumbass," Sasuke lifted up the box lid, revealing a little polaroid camera.

Naruto had the decency to look sheepish.

"Whoops."

Sasuke fiddled with the camera, vaguely aiming at Naruto and pressing the button.

"Oi!" Naruto noticed the flash go off. He flattened the dress to his body and shuffled over to Sasuke.

The camera made a buzzing noise for a moment, then spat out a photo onto the floor.

"It's blurry," Sasuke noted as he picked it up, "stay still."

He held the camera up again.

"Uh—wait, you have to be in it, too!" Naruto protested, but he waited in place as Sasuke backed up a little and snapped another photo.

This one was much better—it captured Naruto's embarrassed little smile, his bright eyes, and his absolutely ridiculous outfit. Sasuke pocketed it.

"Uh," Naruto eyed the motion suspiciously.

"There might be a timer function," Sasuke fiddled with the camera, trying to see if there was some obvious method of changing a setting. He pressed a button. The flash went down.

He scowled and pressed it again. Okay, not that one. Well…

"Let me see," Naruto pulled the camera towards him, leaning in to Sasuke so they could both see it. Sasuke blinked for just a moment longer than normal.

"…I have no idea what I'm looking at," Naruto muttered.

"Idiot," he breathed, consciously making an effort to not lean in to Naruto. He could practically smell his hair…in fact, he could. He recognized that shampoo.

"You know what," Naruto seemed entirely oblivious, "let's just try it like this."

He turned the camera around and pointed it at them. The flash went off. Sasuke caught the picture just before it hit the ground.

"That's no good," he said as it started to fade in to view, "it's all me."

He showed it to Naruto, who grimaced.

"Okay, come closer," Naruto huddled close to him again.

Sasuke closed his eyes, and focused on breathing—and _not_ on Naruto's scantily clad body pressed up against him.

The camera flashed, and his eyes sprang open. Naruto grabbed the photo, this time.

"I think I blinked," he offered as Naruto looked at the photo.

"You look like you're trying to stop yourself from punching me."

"Or that," he smirked. Naruto shoved his shoulder.

"Ass," he said. "Okay, wait, let's try from above. That way Kiba can see I wore the whole thing."

Oh, right. They were doing this for Kiba.

He looked up at the camera. Naruto's body pressed back against his, and he took a moment to grieve at how incredibly easy it would be to put his arms around the blonde.

Today was going to be torture.

"Oh, wait!" Naruto grabbed the photo, "go back, go back."

"Is it not good?"

"No, it's fine, but this is better," Naruto leaned back against Sasuke and flipped his middle finger up at the camera. Sasuke chuckled—the camera flashed.

"Perfect," Naruto grabbed the picture, "Aw, I like this one. I don't think I've ever seen you smiling in a picture before."

Naruto stared down at it, smiling, and Sasuke fought to move away. He didn't _want_ to—Naruto's body was warm and still pressed up against his, but he had maintained this position for far too long and soon Naruto was going to realize that something was up—

"Let's take another one," Naruto said, "I don't want to give this to Kiba."

Sasuke was not going to survive this.

"Okay," he agreed—as if he could do anything else when Naruto was involved—

Naruto leaned back into him and he lifted his arm up above them. Sasuke's hands hovered somewhere between by his sides and Naruto's body—this just wasn't _fair_ —

"You gotta look at the camera, Sasuke," Naruto sounded exasperated, a photo in his hands, "come on, asshole."

Sasuke blinked. He hadn't even noticed the photo being taken.

"Idiot," he responded on autopilot.

Naruto turned to face him.

"Here, what if—" he pressed his body up against Sasuke's and Sasuke stopped breathing, "what if we take it like this…"

Naruto held the camera out to the side and stuck out his tongue. Sasuke found his eyes glued to Naruto's face—his fingers brushed the hem of Naruto's skirt—he could feel something building in his chest and yet he still couldn't find his breath—

The camera flashed and Sasuke stumbled backwards, his hands recoiling into fists.

Naruto blinked at him.

"One of those will be good enough," Sasuke said, turning away.

"Wait, Sa—"

"I'm going to—go to the bathroom," he refused to look at Naruto.

"Hang on," Naruto grabbed his arm, "are you okay?"

"I'm fine," he wrenched his arm from Naruto's grip.

"Sas—whoa—!"

Sasuke's sudden movement made Naruto stumble forwards—his socks had been falling the entire time they had been taking photos and the silky material apparently didn't make for a very good grip, because Naruto immediately collapsed into Sasuke, taking them both down.

Sasuke's breath was unceremoniously knocked out of him as his back hit the hardwood, Naruto's head crashing into his stomach.

"Ow," Naruto grumbled. The fall had caused his already flimsy zipper to become entirely undone, and one puffy sleeve of his dress fell off of his shoulder—the effect was only worsened as he sat up.

Sasuke swallowed several times, immediately forgetting about any pain he might have been in.

"Sorry," Naruto said, moving his torso off Sasuke, but still remaining sitting between Sasuke's legs. More importantly—to Sasuke, anyways—was Naruto's hand, which had moved from the other side of Sasuke's leg to casually rest on his thigh. Sasuke felt like it was burning a mark into his skin.

"…okay?"

Sasuke blinked. Had Naruto been speaking?

"Hm?"

If anything, Naruto looked even more worried.

"Okay, you're not okay," Naruto propped himself up on his heels and the dress fell a little further down, "you didn't hit your head, did you?"

Naruto moved up, reaching for towards Sasuke. Sasuke batted the hand away without thinking.

"No!" His voice sounded far too panicked for his liking. Naruto's eyebrows rose.

"No," he repeated, clearing his throat a little, "I'm fine."

Sasuke desperately attempting to get his thoughts back in order and _oops_ there went his eyes to Naruto's exposed chest again—

"Sasuke—"

"Naruto—just—just get off me, will you?"

"Ah—yeah," Naruto pulled back, "okay…"

Sasuke pulled away and barely resisted the urge to curl into a ball—he stood up, instead, scurrying out of the room as fast as his feet would take him.

* * *

Naruto sighed, picking up the photos that had scattered around them. Sasuke could be so… _moody_ sometimes. It was so hard to tell what he was thinking.

He paused at the photo where Sasuke was smiling, his heart skipping a beat. Making Sasuke laugh—it was up there with some of the best feelings in the world. He had to put this somewhere special. Photos with Sasuke were rare enough, but this one…

He picked up the next one—the last one they had taken. Sasuke's lips were slightly parted and he was looking at Naruto, but his eyes were covered by his bangs. Knowing Sasuke, that hair was probably hiding a glare. He supposed he had bothered him quite a bit, but…

Maybe he'd keep this photo too. And the one that was just of Sasuke. And the one he would show Kiba—he had never specified that Naruto had to _give_ him the picture, had he?

Shoving everything together in a pile, Naruto pulled up his socks and went to go find the stubborn bastard. He still had a bet to uphold, after all.

* * *

Sasuke splashed his face with more water. That had been—that had been _way_ too close. Way too fucking close. He had to get it together.

Maybe he could just ask Naruto to leave. He knew that Sasuke didn't generally enjoy these types of things, so maybe…

He sighed, water dripping down into the sink.

No, Naruto would absolutely take it personally, and Sasuke would drown in guilt for the rest of the night.

And every minute until he saw Naruto's smiling face again.

He was so…

A knock on the door made Sasuke nearly jump out of his skin.

"Sasuke," Naruto called, "want me to make dinner or something?"

Sasuke blinked.

"…Oi, asshole!" Naruto banged on the door again.

Sasuke grabbed the towel, wiping his face as he opened the door.

"Why would I want you to make dinner?"

He threw the towel onto the counter, eyes studiously avoiding Naruto's chest—why wouldn't that damn thing stay _on_?

"'Cause I have to do stuff for the bet," Naruto paused for a second, "did you take another shower?"

"No. And I like my house intact, thank you." He moved past him.

"Hey!" Naruto shuffled beside him, "I can cook. You know I can cook."

"You can boil water. I hardly think that counts."

"Fine, ass," they made it to the kitchen and Naruto leaned back against the counter, uncaring that his socks had fallen yet again, "then what do you want me to do?"

Sasuke rolled his eyes, trying to determine if he really was hungry or not. Naruto likely was, considering he had asked…

"Or should I say something like…'what are your orders, master'?"

Sasuke nearly fell over.

"What do you think—just master, or master Sasuke? Or master Uchiha? You can be like batman! Master Wayne," Naruto put on a terrible accent.

Sasuke stifled a smile, still trying to calm his fluttering heart.

"You are such an idiot."

"And you hang out with me anyway," Naruto stuck his smiling face right in Sasuke's view—far too close for comfort, but Sasuke didn't move away.

Naruto only laughed, before shuffling over to the other side of the counter.

"Okay—no food. What do you want? Drinks?"

Sasuke shrugged, busying himself with anything other than that brilliant smile.

"Ahah! Not a no," Naruto pointed at him in victory, "drinks it is!"

* * *

Three glasses of wine later, Sasuke considered the fact that maybe, in the grand scheme of him and Naruto, _he_ was the idiot.

Naruto bent across the couch to grab the remote, and Sasuke shamelessly eyed his back, the alcohol slowly chipping away at his restraint. Something about the outfit being ready to fall off at any time…

He took another sip of the glass. On the other hand, it was the only thing stopping him from drooling at this point.

"What do you wanna watch?"

He shrugged, debating if he had some sort of juice he could disguise as wine. Maybe he could just switch to water and say that he was tired…

"C'mon, asshole," Naruto smiled at him from the edge of the couch, "come sit down."

Maybe Naruto knew exactly what he was doing, Sasuke considered as he sat down. Maybe he knew all about the power he held over him…maybe he knew exactly how he looked since he had given up on pulling his sleeves back up…

He took another sip. A very large sip.

Maybe he could skip to passing out from the alcohol.

"'Mkay—there," Naruto put the remote down and relaxed back into the couch, his sleeve falling further down his shoulder, "d'you have a blanket or something?"

Sasuke quirked an eyebrow.

"Cold?"

"Well, yeah," Naruto gestured to himself, "look at me."

Oh, Sasuke was _definitely_ looking. In a moment of insanity, he wrestled with the urge to simply open his arms for the blonde.

He won the fight by rolling off the couch instead.

"Oof."

"Are you okay?" Naruto sounded more amused than concerned.

"That was on purpose," Sasuke muttered, brushing himself off.

"I can get the blanket if you want," Naruto looked like he was fighting the urge to laugh.

"No," Sasuke answered, immediately turning around. The sooner he got away from Naruto, the better.

* * *

Naruto yelped as a blanket was unceremoniously thrown on top of him.

"Gah! Sasuke," he pulled the blanket off his head, "I nearly spilled all over your couch."

"You'd get the bill," Sasuke didn't seem remotely fazed, "what did I miss?"

"Absolutely nothing 'cept I drank the rest of your drink," he sat up, leaning over the back of the couch to give Sasuke his brightest smile.

Sasuke stared at him for a moment.

"I didn't wanna move," he said, brandishing the nearly empty cup.

Sasuke plucked it out of his hands, finishing it in one swift motion before turning around.

"Hey—wait! Fill mine too," Naruto jumped forwards and grabbed the cup off the table before waving it at Sasuke.

Sasuke grabbed it, flipping a casual, "pull your dress up," as he left.

Naruto blinked, realizing the top half of the dress had nearly fallen down to his waist. He frowned at it. He could pull it up, but…

He pulled his arms out and fiddled with the dress, tying the sleeves together around his hips. This would work, right?

Naruto threw his arms out as Sasuke came back.

"What do you think?"

Sasuke paused—staring at him for several long moments.

"You didn't fix it," Sasuke's voice sounded strange—as if he was somehow straining to speak. Probably trying not to laugh at how ridiculous Naruto looked.

"It keeps falling off, so I tied it," he sat up so he was kneeling, "so now it'll stay."

He moved his hips back and forth to accentuate the point.

"Oh," he glanced back at the TV, "I forgot to pause the movie when you left. And I wasn't really paying attention. Should I rewind it?"

Sasuke didn't reply. Naruto leaned back over the couch, reaching his arms out.

"Here," he grabbed at the drinks. Sasuke handed them over wordlessly.

Naruto threw him a grin. He just felt so _good_ when Sasuke was around—and the alcohol only seemed to intensify the feeling.

He took a swig of his drink before he put them both down. He was pretty sure he had had a lot more than Sasuke had, but he couldn't bring himself to care.

"Come on, asshole," Naruto grinned back at Sasuke, who was taking _forever_ to come sit down.

Naruto pulled his legs up onto the couch, bringing them close to make room as Sasuke sat down. Sasuke really looked good today…well, he looked good _every_ day, but today he just…

"You have a pretty face," Naruto giggled a little, "has anyone ever told you that?"

Sasuke gave him an incredulous look.

"Are you high?"

"No," he grinned, "I'm drunk. But it's true."

He examined Sasuke's face again. He couldn't seem to stop looking at it.

He leaned forward, squinting at Sasuke. How was it possible that someone was so good-looking? It wasn't fair.

"What?" Sasuke's voice was quiet.

Naruto didn't reply, only looking over Sasuke again.

"Naruto…"

Naruto focused on Sasuke's lips as they moved. They looked so soft…they probably felt really nice. And he was so close to them—maybe he could just—just a little—

Oh.

Oh shit.

* * *

Sasuke blinked as Naruto practically flung himself away from him. For a moment there, it had almost seemed like—

"I—uh—I'm gonna go to the bathroom," Naruto mumbled, sliding off the couch.

The blonde was gone before Sasuke had a chance to reply.

Sasuke stared after him.

What the hell had just happened?

* * *

Naruto spun on his feet, pacing back and forth along the bathroom floor. Okay. Okay.

So he wasn't entirely straight. Okay—fine. That was fine.

He stumbled a bit as he turned.

And maybe he was a _tiny_ bit attracted to Sasuke. Sasuke was a good-looking guy—that was normal, right? Lots of people were attracted to Sasuke.

Never mind that Naruto had been spending practically every day with him, never mind that Naruto found excuses to visit his desk throughout the day, never mind that he had seen Sasuke naked today and _oh my god was he getting hard_ —

Naruto slapped his hands on the sink and stared at himself in the mirror.

He wanted to slap himself—he needed to get a grip, right fucking now. Sasuke was probably going to come check that he wasn't vomiting in here any second now, and Naruto needed to act totally normal.

Totally normal in a frilly maid costume.

Naruto felt the hysteria build up in him. Of all the days to realize he had feelings for his best friend—of all the fucking times—

"Naruto? Are you okay?"

Naruto froze.

"Fine!" His voice didn't crack. It absolutely did not crack.

* * *

The door opened to reveal a…frazzled-looking Naruto. He didn't _look_ like he'd been sick, but the blonde did tend to hide things like that…

"Are you sure?" He moved closer, trying to get a better look at him. He stopped as Naruto flinched away from him.

What the hell?

"Yeah—I'm fine!" Naruto made a show of moving around him, "let's go back to the movie!"

And without waiting for a response, he was gone. Again.

Well, one thing was for certain: something was up with Naruto, and Sasuke was going to find out what it was. He paused, eyeing the kitchen on his way back to the couch.

Maybe more alcohol would help.

* * *

Naruto was seriously considering putting the dress back on. In his new, hypersensitive state, he was very aware of how close Sasuke was sitting, the way Sasuke's thigh rested on his just a little, and the way their arms pressed together. He could feel how warm Sasuke's body was, and his mind kept wandering in the worst sort of ways…

He diverted his eyes, yet again, as Sasuke glanced at him. He could feel Sasuke's eyes on him as if they were burning holes into his skin—he focused on his drink, instead. Maybe more alcohol would make him relax…

* * *

"Okay, I think you've had enough," Sasuke said as Naruto slipped for the third time on the way to the kitchen.

"S'not me! It's," Naruto sat down on the floor, fiddling with his socks, "it's these fuckin' socks—they suck!"

Sasuke surreptitiously took Naruto's cup and put it on the counter. Naruto kicked one of his feet out, yanking the sock towards him.

Sasuke rolled his eyes. This was never going to work—and Naruto…Naruto needed to go to bed.

"Come on, idiot," Sasuke mumbled, leaning down to grab ahold of Naruto. The blonde yelped as Sasuke picked him up—bridal style—in one smooth motion.

Well, what Sasuke hoped was smooth. He wasn't exactly sober either.

Sasuke swayed a little as he stood, shifting Naruto up towards himself until the blonde got the message, and gripped Sasuke back.

"I can walk," Naruto's speech was a little slurred.

"You've proven otherwise," Sasuke didn't miss a beat, making his way down the hall. Naruto likely could walk on his own—in fact, he absolutely could do so—but Sasuke was infinitely grateful that the blonde said nothing else as Sasuke nudged the bedroom door open with his hip.

He ducked a little as they reached the bed, letting Naruto slip down his body. Unfortunately, he overestimated drunken Naruto's dexterity, and instead of easily rolling into the bed, Naruto took Sasuke with him.

"Na—wh—" Sasuke's stomach turned as he fell forwards. He desperately tried to catch himself, but Naruto's body trapped his arm underneath them both—

Sasuke landed, his lips barely an inch from Naruto's, their bodies firmly pressed together.

It was all Sasuke could do to remember to breathe. His body felt like it was on fire—the nerves danced through every inch of his blood, he could feel Naruto's breath on his lips and Naruto's eyes on him and Naruto's body underneath his and—gravity was suddenly the most powerful force in the universe—

The gap closed, and Sasuke was in heaven.

It was better than his dreams—it was better than his greatest fantasies—Naruto's lips felt like perfection as they moved against his— _oh god they were moving against his_ —

Sasuke's free hand shook as he moved it up—he wanted to touch Naruto, so badly, but he didn't—he didn't know if—

Naruto wrapped his arms around him, one hand in Sasuke's hair, and pulled.

Naruto wanted this.

Oh, god, _Naruto wanted this_.

All at once, Sasuke came alive. All the restraint—everything he had stifled and crushed for months—for _years_ —it spread through his body as if it was the blood in his veins. His arms moved on their own, his lips kissed with a ferocity he didn't know he had—any noises he made were entirely out of his control—

Naruto broke for air, panting, but Sasuke was a man addicted—he had tasted Naruto, and now he couldn't stay away—

He kissed and nipped at Naruto's neck, only now able to free the arm that had been wrapped underneath him but still unable to bring himself to move it away—Naruto made a noise, a moan, and it struck through Sasuke like lightening—he gasped, lips still pressed against Naruto's skin, as he felt the blonde lift his hips. Sasuke slipped between Naruto's legs and then he saw stars—Naruto's legs wrapped around him, pressing them together—his bare thighs on either side of Sasuke—

He pushed forwards, one hand slipping up Naruto's thigh—up his skirt—pulling Naruto's hips as close as they could go—he just—ah—he just needed to be closer—closer—oh god— _closer_ —

"S—Sasuke," the way Naruto gasped his name had Sasuke's cock ready to explode, "wait—"

Sasuke pulled back, only for Naruto to frantically start fiddling with his pants—it took him a second longer than it should have to register that Naruto wanted him naked—he stifled the thrill that the thought caused him lest he cum in his pants right that second—

He tossed his shirt, kicking his pants down to his ankles before Naruto touch had him going _wild_ —he gathered his thoughts just enough to pull Naruto's briefs down before they pressed together again—

"Nngh!"

The feeling of Naruto's skin against his—the feeling of his cock, just as hard as Sasuke's was—was almost too much to handle. Sasuke shuddered, stuck somewhere in between cumming and pulling back—the thought occurred to him that he had condoms in the drawer beside this bed and he stopped moving completely—

"Wha—" Naruto was panting, "what's wrong?"

Sasuke sucked in a breath, dulling the ecstasy that flooded through him.

"I want," he thanked the alcohol for giving him the strength to say the words, "to have sex with you."

He pulled back, searching Naruto's eyes. The blonde didn't look surprised, per say, but—

"Okay," his eyes were a little wide, but he smiled, "I trust you."

Sasuke breathed in.

"I—is that what you want?"

Naruto's mouth opened and closed, and then he gave Sasuke a sheepish smile.

"I've never—uh—had sex with a guy," he laughed a little, "so I—I don't know what I'm doing. But I wanna try. With you."

Sasuke felt himself crumble. He buried his face into Naruto neck, crossing his arms underneath Naruto's back to pull him close. He felt…completely unable to respond. This was…

"But—no wait, I have a condition," Naruto said. Sasuke pulled back to look at him.

"We gotta do it again when we're sober."

"…Fuck," Sasuke breathed, hugging Naruto to him again, "you—stupid idiot—"

Naruto made a noise halfway in between a snort and a giggle. Sasuke pressed another kiss to his neck, then to his collarbone, his chest—he paused to nip and suck at his nipple—he seemed to like that...interesting…

Sasuke nudged Naruto's makeshift skirt up with his head, just enough so that it wouldn't get in the way. He used one hand to position Naruto's cock at his mouth, and the other waited at Naruto's entrance. If he was going to fuck Naruto, he was going to do it _properly_ …

He ran his tongue along Naruto's cock, feeling around for his drawers while he did so. He grabbed the lube the moment he could, squirting some onto his fingers.

He pressed a finger inside Naruto at the same time he took him into his mouth—he nearly came at the sound that Naruto made. Thank god nothing was touching his cock right now because _fuck_ —the noises that Naruto was making—the feeling of him in his mouth— _god_ —

Sasuke pushed his finger in as far as it would go as he deep-throated him—he wondered if he could put in a second—

"Sa—ahh," Naruto gasped, "I'm not gonna last much longer—this—nngh!"

Sasuke redoubled his efforts, pushing in a second finger as he licked and sucked. The lube had made Naruto so slick and wet, Sasuke wondered if he might have used too much—he hoped not—

"Damn it, Sasuke," Naruto's hands gripped his hair so hard it was painful, "I mean it, I'm gonna cum right now if you don't—"

Sasuke didn't need telling twice.

He sprung up—grabbing a condom from the still-open drawer and ripping it open with his teeth. He had it on his cock in record time, barely suppressing a shudder as he applied lube to himself—whether it was from the lube being slightly cold or the pure excitement throbbing through his veins he didn't know—

"Ready?" He forced himself to ask. He wanted to enter Naruto so desperately—it was taking every ounce of his willpower to hold himself back, the head of his cock pressed against Naruto's hole—

Naruto's legs wrapped around him—Sasuke sucked in a breath as he felt them hook behind his back, pulling him forward, pulling him _into_ Naruto—

"O-oh—go—Na—" He gasped for air—the pleasure seemed to have taken control of his body, he couldn't feel anything else—he never had felt anything like this—

Naruto's hips shifted and Sasuke took it as his cue to move. It was a good thing Naruto was taking control because Sasuke could barely remember who he was at this point—too lost in the perfection that was Naruto's body— _god_ he felt so good—

Sasuke sat up just enough so that he could see Naruto properly—Naruto, underneath him, gasping for air…it was better than he had ever fantasized. Naruto's lips were wet and parted, his eyebrows creased but his eyes were open, watching Sasuke with hooded, lustful eyes—Sasuke ran his hands down Naruto's thighs, reaching under the dress to squeeze his hips—his ass—he pulled Naruto closer, the pleasure jolting through him with each movement—using his grip on Naruto's hips to get deeper, faster—he just—he wanted more of Naruto, he couldn't just enough—he wanted _all_ of him—he wanted—he wa—

"Naru—ahhhh!"

With a yell, Sasuke came—harder than he ever had. The pleasure rocketed through him, shaking him to his core. For a moment, his vision blacked out and he felt a rush—an overwhelming burst of emotion, as if he was feeling everything at once—and as his vision came back he felt the sting of tears in his eyes.

"Fuck—nngh, Sa—a-ah-aah!" Naruto yelled, collapsing back onto the bed as the cum squirted onto his stomach. Sasuke barely remembered to keep thrusting, his grip on Naruto's thighs the only thing keeping him grounded to reality.

"A-ah," Naruto panted, releasing his legs from around Sasuke. Sasuke took it as his cue to pull out—slowly, savouring each moment of feeling himself inside of Naruto…

"Shit," Naruto gave him a shaky smile, and Sasuke's heart skipped a beat, "that was..."

He brought a hand up to run through his hair.

"That was really fucking good," he gave a breathy laugh, "I had no idea…"

He heaved a sigh, staring at Sasuke with such a brilliant smile that any nerves were gone as soon as they came. Sasuke couldn't seem to find his voice, his throat still thick from all that Naruto made him feel.

"C'mere..."

Naruto's hand guided him down for another kiss—this one broken only by Naruto's smile—or was it Sasuke's?

Naruto pulled away, falling back down onto the bed. Sasuke moved to throw the condom out, the fatigue finally setting into his brain. He had no idea how exhausted he had been…

"Can you help me?" Naruto mumbled as Sasuke turned around.

Sasuke grabbed a few tissues and wiped Naruto down, before finally pulling off the rest of the maid costume at the blonde's request.

"We," Naruto started, "can't give that back to Kiba."

Sasuke laughed. He couldn't help it.

"And you were calling _him_ the pervert," Sasuke muttered, tossing the costume on the floor.

Naruto giggled, grabbing Sasuke as he moved closer to the bed.

"Jokes on me," he threw the covers overtop of them, "you were the pervert all along."

Sasuke found just enough energy to whack Naruto's shoulder.

"…idiot."

Naruto laughed again, eyes closed as he huddled closer to him.

"What do you think for next time?" Naruto's voice was starting to slur, "like a…police stripper? Or school uniform…I gotta find somethin' that 'ctually fits me…"

"Go to sleep, idiot," Sasuke muttered, amused.

Naruto's eyes blearily blinked open. He looked like he wanted to do nothing more than close them, but he stayed watching Sasuke.

Sasuke rolled just enough to press a kiss to Naruto's forehead.

"I don't care what you do," he said quietly, "as long as there is a next time."

He blamed the alcohol—and the fatigue—for the honesty, but it seemed to do the trick. Naruto's face lightened into a brilliant, tired smile, and his eyes closed again as he huddled against to Sasuke. Sasuke automatically squeezed him closer. This felt so nice…

"I didn' know…'till today," Naruto mumbled into his skin.

Sasuke tilted his head a little.

"Louder, idiot," he pressed a kiss to Naruto's temple.

Naruto suddenly let out a giggle.

"I didn't know," he raised his head, "I liked guys until today."

…

"You—what?!"

* * *

 _A/N: Poor Kiba! He didn't get any pictures_ _—or his costume back. Ah, well_ _—sacrifices for a good cause, no? We appreciate your accidental matchmaking, Kiba!_

 _It's been a while! Let me know what you guys think._

 _Until next time!_

 _\- Kinomi_


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